10 Tips for Grad School Interviews

Here's what I've learned so far from interviewing at PA schools this year. Take it with a grain of salt, and interpret as you will. Have fun, and happy reading. :)

1. Don't be nervous. 

If you think that's not possible, because you're the type to stress out over everything and anything, let me tell you. You need to relax. Be normal, and be yourself. I think this is one of the most important factors to help you interview well! Nervousness can make even the most confident person stutter or mess up their words, and it won't be an accurate representation of who you are. It also shows that you are able to interact well under pressure. 

2. Don't think that this is your one and only option, that you're so desperate, that your universe will crash if you don't get in. 

Alright, you can feel that way inwardly, but don't let it show. No one likes super desperate people -- at least, not with grad schools. Rather, be confident in yourself, and let that maturity show. So when everyone else is sitting there tensely with stoic facial expressions -- I'm telling you, it's really obvious when you're nervous and/or desperate -- you can start conversation, break the ice (which is more like a glacier), crack some jokes, and get to meet new people. It's fun!

3. Don't over analyze or replay the interview over and over. And over. 

Someone told me that about 98% of people come out thinking they should've said this instead, or shouldn't have said something, or just honestly being overly critical. Yes, know what you could've done better, but for next time. The past is the past, and your interview is done. Done. 

4. Don't fall into the trap of sizing up the other applicants. 

I get it. It's natural. If someone's brought a parent with them, it's instinctual to have an opinion. Or seeing someone questionably dressed. But seriously? Be above that. Avoid topics (and people) who talk about their application, where they have been accepted, and also seem probing. You've all made it to this point. Use your time well and rather, take in the atmosphere. Constantly be thinking critically if you can see yourself thriving there, what reservations you have about the program, and if this is where you belong. 

5. Think positive. 

Yes, there's always the "what if". But you've come this far, invested time and finances. It's difficult to think all that energy and work wasted when you get a rejection. But when I interviewed at a place hundreds of miles away, I tried to think -- well, at least I can say I've traveled here on my own, saved myself some deposit money to reserve a seat, and got to see a beautiful place and meet others who may be my coworkers someday. It's a privilege and honor to make it as far as you have, and even though you may not have that acceptance just yet, don't lose hope. 

6. Learn. Use every moment there to absorb, so you can process it later if you have to make the decision between that school or another. 

Find out where students study. How well is the program set up? Are the students happy? Would you want to live there for 5, 10 years? What features of the program are different from others -- and is that beneficial or harmful for YOU?

7. Ask questions, but pay attention. 

Really find out about the school, so you're able to ask real, legit questions that will provide the most value to you. Don't be that person who always asks, Why should we attend your program? What makes it different from other schools? Seriously. Do some research, and you should already know this, so you can ask questions about it, rather than being clueless. 

8. No program is without its faults. 

You just need to know what is a priority to you, and what you're okay with. Are cadavers a priority? The length of each rotation? The pass rates for boards? The resources and size of the school? Tuition and living expenses? Although I wish that there was a perfect school for every one of us, there's not. Evaluate what's important to you, and do well to stick by it. 

9. Take the chance to get to know people. It'll make it fun and that much more interesting. 

By get to know, I don't mean asking about their "stats", or their background, or anything that could be interpreted as evaluating the competition. Care about them as a person; treat it like a mystery to unravel. You could be future classmates or coworkers!

10. Last, but not least, enjoy your time. 

Treat it as a new, interesting experience that is (sort-of) once-in-a-lifetime. Take advantage of all the new experiences you are presented with. 

Being an Artist: Dealing with Creative Failure

For all you creative beings out there, we've all experienced it: that moment when we don't feel like anything good is happening, and when we try to force it, it turns out terrible and makes you feel even worse -- like a creative failure. 

I call it the "creative rut" -- where I'm stuck and all I do is complain (yesterday was one of those days, and I felt thankful that I had another part-time job to go to). Thanks, friends, for sticking it out with me. 

Here are a few options when you hit one of these creative blocks:

Take a break. 
When artists get in their creative mode, and take charge and work like there's anything else worth living for. . well, it's going to hit a stop point somewhere along the road. About 74.593% of the time, this works for me. Whether it's half an hour, or a week, this effective method can recharge you like nothing else, and you'll be freshly inspired. 

Try a different creative-something. 
Do something that's not your usual style, and don't feel pressured for it to turn out a certain way. I normally paint, and I'll try illustration or calligraphy. Get that sketchbook filled!

Explore other artists and their work. 
Looking at other people's paintings and art always puts my artistic mind into perspective. Remember things that you like and want to incorporate into your work, and learn from the stuff you don't like. Browsing others' art inspires me to keep going -- that so many possibilities exist for exploration. Instagram is a great source! This'll help guide you in your next work when all those ideas start flowing again. 


What is your experience with creative failure? Would love to hear if anyone has other methods for dealing with this nuisance!

What's Your Art Attitude?

What are the beginning days like for a gap year student? (after the initial rush of sending out job applications)

Well, for this one, it consists of having breakfast and coffee, painting, looking through photos for inspiration, stalking Indeed and Careerbuilders for new job postings, and having my phone glued to my personal space in case of any important phone calls. I paint some more, take breaks, read a little, then keep working. Usually it's one or two job applications a day -- I've vowed not to commit to just any job.

Meanwhile, though, I've been wanting to do some great work. My art has turned into a greater priority for me, so I've been working on staying committed to revive my little art studio. It's going to take a lot, so I've only been applying for part-time jobs. Once I realized I needed to make this commitment work, I  toughened my attitude to make it more serious.

Here's what I realized:

A "professional" artist, versus an amateur. . . 

1. An amateur waits for inspiration, for the right mood to strike, whereas a professional will paint every day, despite lack of inspiration. 

I'm actually often guilty of this -- Italy became my inspiration, but I'm realizing that this is about work ethic. It's about being okay with every painting not turning out to be a musem-worthy miracle, and going after your art like it's worth it. Practice makes perfect.

2. An amateur doesn't have a work schedule, whereas a professional stays organized. 

Although we have a stereotypical, reckless artist who has a hippie viewpoint for just about everything in life, it's important to set a general schedule and goals. When starting out, I set a goal for how many paintings I wanted to have by the end of the week. I exceeded the goal, and although it was difficult at first -- to where I would have migraines in the afternoon, and my eyes felt like they would burn off from soreness -- I think I've been rewarded with a routine.

3. An amateur struggles with finishing artwork, whereas a professional is productive and continues to create new pieces. 

I can relate. Before Italy, I could stop painting whenever. If the struggle became too great, if it just didn't look right, I had the freedom to stop. It wasn't for a class, it wasn't going into a gallery, and if it wasn't a gift or commission for somebody, nobody cared -- including me. When I would finish a piece, it felt like I could constantly work on it to make it better. The truth is, art is a process, and nothing will be perfect. Usually, the goal is not to have one particular masterpiece, but to develop skills to use for the next piece -- since the aim is to simply keep creating.

The results? All these paintings you see on this post were painted within the last week.

By "professional", I don't necessarily mean making a living as an artist, doing this for a career, or living on ramen. In my purposes, I'm referring to a change in attitude -- which is essential for me to accomplish this artistic growth in my gap year, and to be taken more seriously.

I'm inadvertently learning (from these job recruiters and interviews) that people will only take your art as seriously as you do -- or less, but never more. It's been instinct for years to say, "Oh, I just paint. On the side. I sell them online." But now, I'm trying to get into the habit of responding with, "I have an art studio, and I sell my work." The facts are the same, but I think it makes a difference.

Hope you enjoy browsing and getting a glimpse of Italy. I should have my Etsy shop up and running soon, so if I owe you a painting, please bear with me. When I hit a certain number of paintings, you can choose from them or have your piece customized as you'll have a better idea of my painting style.

The Start of My Gap Year

It's almost been a week since I've been back from Italy, but it's felt like both a millennium and a mere day.

I hit the ground running when I landed back onto North American ground, and within 48 hours, I had gotten a haircut, checked out a book from the library, bought some art supplies, picked up my mom from the airport, sent in 6 job applications, and started cleaning out my belongings. The next day, I surprised myself (but nobody else) by falling asleep at 2 in the afternoon and sleeping like the dead for 3 hours. 

It's been slightly less hectic since then -- but not by much.

It's a wonder how many things you suddenly want to toss out and reorganize once you've comfortably survived with a mere fraction of your belongings. It's as if my life is split: before Italy and after Italy. I've turned into one of those minimalistic creatures who have all these grand plans. At first, it seemed like I'd reached too far and nothing would get done.

But then I got these two books that launched my gap year off perfectly: Do More Great Work (by a plethora of authors) and Love Does (Bob Goff). I finished Love Does yesterday -- and wow. You don't have to agree with every line he says, but this man and his attitude towards life is pretty incredible and insightful. I haven't read through a book this fast since high school - so I highly, highly recommend taking a look. It's a fast read, full of short stories that will cause you not to just nod and agree, but want to do something about it. 

I've been making a list of dreams, goals, and whimsies for this year, and I already know firsthand -- it's going to take an almost infinite amount of self-motivation to live this year with no regrets. But I'm acquiring a buddy system, a support group, that even though it sometimes seems like I'm alone in this process, I need to remember that I'm not.

I'm also not one to care much about what the rest of the world thinks of me and my life, but for some reason, I always land the privilege of hearing its opinion anyway. Yesterday morning, I went to the dentist's, and predictably, the first get-to-know-you question was: "So what are you up to these days -- school? Or are you working?"

The hygienist gave me a sympathetic look at the mention of my job search. The dentist congratulated me with his typical silly demeanor, but yet with serious undertones, told me to goof off and enjoy it while it lasts. But with the wisdom of a old grandfather, he gave his stamp of approval at the mention of PA school. Later that day, during a pseudo-phone interview for a job, I'm asked about where my paintings can be found, and the recruiter came to his own conclusion: that I was a scientist who was trying to start up her art business but needed some extra cash.

I'm tempted to shake my head and smile, but I have a feeling I'll be doing that a lot this year. We'll let the world think what it thinks. Meanwhile, we'll see where life takes me with my paintings, jobs, and PA school.
Cheers to unknown adventures and the unlimited possibilities in life.

Am I ready to go home?

This post may seem premature, since I don't return to Ohio until May 23. My school, however, ends on May 9, so discussions center around plane tickets home and summer plans. It didn't help that one of my closest friends here left yesterday (she took the picture above at my school), as her program already finished.

The big question is: am I ready to go home?
or, from the other perspective, am I ready to leave Florence?

To a certain degree, yes.
Each passing day, I am more conscious of the fact and reminded of one more thing I'll come back to. This entire time, I haven't thought about the clothes I've left behind, and now I'm having visions of certain shirts in my wardrobe in Italy. I'm suddenly remembering all the cool things I own, including Italy-themed gifts from my friends, because to be honest -- I've completely forgotten about my things, after living like a minimalist here in Italy. Remember how much (or little) I packed? (Read about it here). Sadly enough, I'm also looking forward to fast, reliable internet. Walking into a cafe that advertises free wifi that's actually there. The affordability of food and clothes. Free bathrooms and water. Food variety. Chocolate chip cookies. Pancakes.

But most importantly, my assured readiness mainly comes from some major epiphanies I had recently about science and art. If there's only one thing I could share about what Italy has done for me, this would be it. Having this said epiphany facilitated my awareness and preparedness to return home -- because ultimately, I've gotten what I've come for.

On top of that, I've something to come back to -- and I'm beyond excited, to say the least. I'll save the details of grad school applications, summer plans, and gap year ideas for another post, but basically, I'm ecstatic about all the opportunities that await me: including the variety of jobs and ways I can spend my time. I have so many different cool experiences to look forward to (we can call the first part of my gap year: life in applications, since that consists of 97.5374% of it).

I'm ready to start another adventure when I return, because apparently, when you're out of school, you are FREE. Want to work full-time? Do it. Start up a new painting series by staying in your studio for 3 days? Why not. Work night shift? There's no class in the morning. 'Tis a strange transition that I've yet to wrap my mind around. I suppose society entrusts that I'll do well with my time.

But then the worries always sprout up: I won't be able to walk everywhere, I can't speak in Italian anymore, I won't eat as much (we'll see about this), or eat out as much (those handy meal tickets have spoiled me); I won't have a painting class, and I'll have to seek out where to satisfy my gelato cravings. I'm afraid I'll fall back to routine, and that my memories of Italy will fade away in some dark, distant corner in my mind. I cannot fathom how that's possible, as I think of my life now as before Italy and after Italy. I'll miss the fresh pastries, walking across the Ponte Vecchio, seeing the Renaissance that lives on here. 

 

To be honest, I'm almost scared to come back. Everyone else, I'm sure, has been undergoing their own changes in life, and I'm fearful of the term we call "reverse culture shock". I hear it's worse than culture shock, which describes the experience when you first are immersed in a new culture. Coming from someone who didn't experience immense culture shock coming to Italy, I'm truly afraid it'll be so much more difficult for me to adjust back. I think of Italy as my home, and the other day, we received a talk about what to expect for reverse culture shock, and I almost got emotional in class. I'll share more on this in future posts, because it's truly helpful for y'all to understand my perspective and for me to understand yours. 

Nowadays, my feelings consist of relief at coming home as well as nostalgia for Florence. I look forward to days when I don't have the hovering thought that this is a once-in-a-lifetime-opportunity; I must make every moment count; I need to try something new today. There's a subconscious pressure of constantly budgeting (hello, no paycheck right now?), constantly learning, absorbing, taking in new things, and making the most of it. It sounds like a great problem to have, but 'tis stressful. 
But on the other hand, I can't imagine not being here anymore, and that makes me into a more desperate person. The other day, I got up at sunrise to sit on the column of the Santa Trinita bridge (which may or may not be illegal), pulled out my watercolors, and painted the Ponte Vecchio with a frenzy I didn't know existed. 

So am I ready to come home? Yes. 

But am I ready to leave Firenze?
Not quite yet. 
I'm getting there, and my brain is adjusting, but we will just say that it's good thing that my time's not over yet.

How do you say good-bye? (Part 1)

Leaving my first [somewhat] real-world job. Last Friday was my last day.

It's bittersweet. Joyous. Depressing. Freeing. Nostalgic. I feel like Rapunzel in the Disney movie Tangled, when she first leaves her tower with Eugene, running around with alternating moods of happiness and horror. Quite the emotional experience.

It's liberating in the sense that you have one less obligation in your life, but scary in that my routine is different along with the coworkers and residents I usually encounter. 

I'm officially done with the two longest jobs I've held in my life: a year and a half (chemistry lab job, and 7 months (as a CNA). It's not that long, I know, but it all had accumulated in my being. Being done with college (yes, I realize it's only been two and a half years) is a strange thought.

(at the memory care side of where I work with dementia residents)

On my last day, I told Mrs. S (a resident from my experience here) that she wouldn't be seeing me here anymore. That I was studying abroad in Italy. She was lying in her bed, our faces a mere six inches apart. To my horror, I noticed redness and puffiness around her eyes. To make things worse, she softly said, "I don't want to cry."
As a girl who has moved approximately twelve times in her twenty-year-old life, the feeling that formed in the pit of my stomach surfaced and I felt my eyes ready to tear up for the first time in years over missing someone.
I naturally comforted her (and myself): "It'll be okay. I hate saying good-byes, too. And I've only been here a short while -- someone else will be here to take care of you." I even tried to laugh it off, saying, "You'll forget about me soon enough."
Looking straight at me, she says with complete seriousness, "It's not a good-bye. It's only a so-long."
At those words, I felt my heart melt a little. 

Because here's a tidbit about me - since I've graduated high school, I have never once met up or seen any friends from high school since graduation, despite my going back there over school breaks and weekends for my family. Once I started college, well, efforts were not made to revisit the past. This probably indicates the degree of my attitude about moving on in life...

College has changed me in many ways: one of which being that I've gotten close to several people, and it's actually going to be difficult to leave, even if it is for Italy. 

Advice for leaving:

Don't think about the last time actually as the last time (unless you are truly celebrating the end because that's how much you dislike your job/this person/this place)

The more you think about while you're there, the greater the depression you will fall in. It's like you're sick and know you're going to throw up because you have the stomach flu, but constantly thinking about that nauseating feeling or envisioning yourself throwing up is only going to make it worse - compared to if you ignored the fact that you did feel nausea but you chose to play Jenga or read a book to take your mind off it. 

Look at the future more than the past. 

Hopefully, changes are occurring because of a better opportunity. Remind yourself of where you are going to next, rather than what you're leaving behind. When I dwell on all the things I will not be able to do anymore, a swoop of nostalgia falls in and I succumb to it. But when I think about my unknown adventure ahead, it's exciting and liberating that my current routine will completely change. 

How Not To Quit Your Job

Here it is. The resignation letter. Sitting in a tasteful arrangement with - that's right, my keys, sunglasses, and a cup of water.

Just for reference, it takes about 20 minutes to formulate and type up a classy I'm-going-to-quit-my-job-and-here's-my-two-weeks letter. [By classy, I mean one that is personal, genuine and yet professional while emotionally touching.] 

But here I am, from this experience, telling you how NOT to quit your job. :)

4 Things Not to Do When Quitting Your Job 
(Source: Things I did when quitting my job)

1. Be awkward.

Plan what you are going to say, and be prepared for any potential questions they may ask - why you are leaving, when you are leaving. Be confident in your decision. (Just so you're warned, this method still did not prevent the awkwardness.)

2. Overplanning. 

I planned when I was going to tell my supervisor, but neither of the times ended up working out. Set several possible times in a general time period. You don't want to inform them too early but you don't want to put it off until you have no choice but the last day. 

3. Telling your coworkers before your manager. 

When my manager reacted by maintaining her smile and accepting my letter, I became extremely worried slightly concerned that she had already known somehow. No matter how much you trust your judgment in character, you never know who will "betray" your trust.

4. Giving the said letter right after a monthly staff meeting in December after being bestowed with multiple gifts from your company.

To defend myself, never in my last six months of working here have I gotten anything remotely like this. In my time of laboring with this place, loving the residents, hating my job, then wondering how I could ever hate my job because I love my job -- I don't recall getting too much appreciation with material gifts. Well, there you go, folks. There's a first time for everything.

What I've Done in My Life: From a 90 Year Old

This weekend I was just reminded of some lovely moments of why this is one of the most beautiful jobs I've had.

I've recently been having an unhealthy obsession with ribbon, bows, and decorating. The whole holiday atmosphere is getting to me. Last night as my roommate was wrapping gifts, I had spent half an hour looking up Youtube videos on how to tie a big ribbon bow for her. In obvious failure. I mean, scissors & pipe cleaners? I guarantee there's at least 10 different ways to do this.

Saturday (at work):
I saw Mrs. S, and her daughter and son-in-law were visiting. I noticed a beautiful bow on their wreath, and asked if they made it. Her son-in-law informed me that Mrs. S and her daughter were bow-making experts.

When I told her this, Mrs. S's daughter pulled out a plethora of ribbon and told me to pick. She proceeded to show me how to make one and walked me through the steps. You can clearly see which one I did… haha. [the bottom one]

Sunday (before and at work):

My old roommate is getting married in 2 weeks! We talked about wedding decoration ideas at lunch, and I proudly told her that I just learned how to tie beautiful ribbon bows. Needless to say, I am now in charge of doing those for her wedding..

I told Mrs. S this when I arrived at work, and later that night she had a conversation with her daughter on the phone:
Daughter: Is this Jennifer who made the bows yesterday?
Mrs. S: Yes, and guess what? Her friend who's getting married wants her to make them for her wedding!
Daughter: Oh my!
Mrs. S: I know - and guess what? Her friend's wedding is in 2 weeks!
Daughter: … oh my goodness! Does she need any help?

:)

Later than night as I assisted her to bed, Mrs. S told me how she got her first job babysitting, then became a secretary.
"I remember the dumbest things I did," she laughed. "I once put mail in a trash bag outside instead of the mailbox!"
She held parties at her home and sold jewelry, until she realized that many of the women who bought the jewelry were poor, and really couldn't afford to buy it, but they did anyway. She quit soon after, saying her conscience couldn't handle that.
"Once, I was in a float in St. Petersburg in Florida. I was the Statue of Liberty."
Me: "You should go back sometime and be an honorary guest!"
Mrs. S: "They'd probably think I was some crazy lady who's making this all up!"

She proceeded to reminisce and share with me her wisdom.

"One thing I've always told myself, is that it's never too late to learn something new." 

{I felt like I was in a movie and being given life advice I hadn't even asked for.}

She recalls three things that she wished she had done:

1) Swimming

She said she could dog paddle but could never swim well or gracefully. Unsurprisingly, all her kids became lifeguards when they were younger. 

2) Publishing a book
I told her I had tried writing a novel when I was 16. I had about 40,000 words down and gave up and decided the life of a writer wasn't for me. With the most vehemence I had ever seen this sweet lady express, Mrs. S shook her fist and insisted, "Oh, you've just got to go back and finish it!"
Taken aback, I responded, "I'll probably go back to it someday."
Her face dawned with an understanding that I couldn't comprehend, as she explained, "Now you're stuck. Stuck in a place where I used to be."
At my confused look, she said: "I used to say that all the time. And now look -- I still don't have anything published."

3) Playing the piano
"I tried to learn when I was younger," Mrs. S said wistfully. "But I quit. But my daughter can play the organ."

I always thought that if I asked someone about life regrets, it would be something humongous. Like, I never should have moved to Ohio. Or, I wish I had waited to get married. But her small list of things shows us that we cannot overlook the small details.

"By the time you get old, you will have regretted things you didn't do more, than the things you have done in your life."

Thanksgiving 2013

My thanksgiving experience this year was one of awareness, to be honest. It all goes back to the beginning of November, when I counted ahead and realized that with the way things were going in my work schedule -- working every other Thursday, mainly -- that I would probably be scheduled to work on Thanksgiving. My shift is 3-11pm. I didn't request off, thinking I wouldn't be missing out on much. My family wasn't doing the whole thanksgiving shebang this year, and my mom was visiting her parents. . . halfway across the world. I didn't think it'd be a big deal. Holiday pay and free ham from my work was compensation, and I accepted it with ease (kind of).

So then I drove straight from my parents' home to work ~ 45 minutes. 

See that lonely stretch of road? Quite depressing to drive to work knowing that most people have the day off… giving thanks.

I began thinking, what is thanksgiving, anyway? An American holiday where we stuff ourselves with amazing food - namely, sweet potato casserole, green beans, turkey, mashed potatoes, etc. and get together with family. {I'm not even going to touch on the Black Friday mess.} But the fact that we have a day off (usually) and a major holiday for it - that's quite a feat. We're supposed to be thankful, but in context, when people are usually thankful - it is TOWARD someone specifically. When we say "thanks" or send thank-you notes, etc. it isn't simply for saying thanks. It's to say thanks to somebody.

I recalled a verse - Colossians 1:12. 

"Giving thanks to the Father, Who has qualified and made us fit to share the portion which is the inheritance of the saints in the light."

This led me to a wonderful verse about thanksgiving - one of my favorites:

Thank [God] in everything [no matter what the circumstances may be, be thankful and give thanks], for this is the will of God for you [who are] in Christ Jesus [the Revealer and Mediator of that will]. (1 Thessalonians 5:18)

Isn't that such GREAT wording? I became so inspired and I felt my spirit was renewed. I didn't feel very thankful that day, to be absolutely honest, but after this, I was ready. I didn't feel thankful, but I gave thanks anyway and that caused me to be thankful.

I started making myself think about all the things I really AM thankful for and needed to acknowledge and praise the Lord for: my job, being able to study abroad in the spring, being almost done with college, my wonderful family, my life, and most of all, that I knew Him, Jesus Christ. Without Him, I would have none of this. 

Moving on. . .

I'm far from perfect, to say the least, and work was work. Actually, probably busier and crazier than normal. Exhausted from everything, and getting home at 11:45pm (you'll learn that in healthcare, you rarely get off work on time), I saw the kitchen light on. I immediately thought, Chere (my roommate) must've forgotten to turn it off. She was working 8pm-4am at Kohl's (the joys of Black Friday, which again, I shall NOT get into) and had left a few hours before.

I was a little hungry (this happens to me after work about 12% of the time) and for some reason, sat down at the kitchen table & debated what I should eat. My options being fruit snacks or tater tots. Then, it was like magic. 

I saw a little note, which you can see below.

[The pie wasn't on the table, of course. I set that out after seeing the note.]

Most of you would think, Aww, how sweet! And don't take me wrong, I did! But if you know me well enough, I absolutely despise all things pumpkin. I hear the word and I want to vomit. (Not physically, just in my mind). I really don't like the taste of pumpkin, the smell of pumpkin, or pumpkin anything. 

So my mind was thinking, Oh, that is so sweet! while at the same time, mentally gagging. I am very proud to say that the sweet side won, and my stomach was too hungry to argue.

For the first time in my 20 years, I willingly ate pumpkin pie.

Look at how delish it looks! (It took me a few bites to get used to it -- and then I could zone out the pumpkin part and simply focus on the yummy crust, haha).

All in all, I gained a new awareness of thanksgiving. :)

Cameras Infiltrate Nursing Homes

The other morning I read this article from the New York Times: Watchful Eye in Nursing Homes.

[My friends often have called me an "old soul" but I looked into it for reasons beyond that. I currently work as a certified nurse aide (CNA) at a local assisted living facility. Always triggering deep thoughts.]

To sum it up, nursing home abuse has been brought to question. The story of an elderly lady's neglect was only revealed in truth due to hidden cameras placed in the room by the family - who became suspicious when items they bought for their mother suddenly disappeared. The video also revealed the nursing assistants abusing their mother verbally and physically. 

I'm not surprised, but calling attention to a specific instance makes it much more real to the rest of us. When I first started working, I became very conscious of the fact that we, who were being paid slightly above minimum wage, were entrusted with the very well-being of so many - often in one-on-one interactions. In some cases, care cannot be verified, since most of the work is done privately between the patient and aide. It's actually a really scary thought. 

You're letting your mom being taken care of by aides you may have never met. You're trusting the facility to hire caring, diligent aides. 

When I started training where I work now, I noticed little things  - even the most seemingly hardworking aide would occasionally skip steps, ie. not using toilet paper after the patient used the bathroom, not brushing their teeth before bed, etc. (The latter is a commonly skipped step due to inadequate staffing - which leads to even bigger problems of oral care and potentially causing death.)

In my opinion, however, this article is only bringing out a side effect of the major, long-lasting problem of inadequate staffing, especially nurse aides. Granted, purposeful abuse is difficult to detect already, but if facilities weren't so desperate for workers, well, it could be minimized simply by choice in candidates. 

{Here's a story: there exists two sides where I work - one being the independent assisted living, the other brig locked down for patients with Alzheimer's and dementia. One notorious aide used to work on the assisted living side - now she only works on the memory care side. Rumor has it that she has been rude and neglectful, refusing to help when asked. Family members complained. 

So why is she now on the side with those with dementia? Because they are unable to report it, due to their memory loss. When they do remember, other aides have told me of some complaints by residents: there is this aide that throws my clothes at me in the morning and yanks my arms, shouting at me to put them on.}

It's a complicated world out there, everyone. 

Adequate staffing would:

- lessen the amount of work per aide, allowing more time 

- more time means more mouth care, emotions care, one-on-one time

- lessen number of falls and accidents

- greater job satisfaction and patient satisfaction

- higher staff retention rate

- save costs on medication (when patients are agitated) 

You get the idea.

Cameras have never been implemented as a requirement, due to the ethical controversy over privacy. I think it's quite sad, though when such measures have to be taken to ensure quality care. What does that say about our system of healthcare and trust?

But when almost everything in this world is based upon profit - well, I'll leave it up to you to discern.